This is part of a series of metaphors where I try to describe what it feels like to live inside my body.
Last week we had had a particularly busy day and late night so the next morning my husband asked, as he often does, how I was feeling. We were at the park watching our daughter play and I tried to describe it. “I feel like a computer that needs updates. You know how you move the mouse and the cursor just isn’t quite in sync? Like there’s a lag? Everything it working but just not quite on time. Y’know?”
And he said “like buffering?”
“Yes! My whole body is buffering.”
Sometimes that’s how it is, every movement is intentional and I have to consciously think it for it to happen and there’s a little lag. It makes me clumsy and frustrated but at least I’m still moving.
So that day I popped some extra mestinon and sped myself right up to normal operating speed. Instant updates.